Degrees Of Separation

Some children will struggle with the first days of preschool, and for others it will be a breeze, says Dr Elizabeth Reed - and the same could be said for parents.

"Few parents reach late January without some anxiety over how their children will settle in to the year ahead. And never more so than when their child is starting preschool and has had little time away from their parents.

"Children pass this milestone in myriad ways. Some can't wait to race off and finger-paint or climb on the monkey bars. The more social among them will delight in seeing new faces and having different people to share their chatter with. But for others there will be reluctance and tears and an unwillingness to let go of their parent's hand. ..."

Disciplinary Action

The ACT Children & Young People Commissioner is questioning the legal use of the defence of ‘reasonable chastisement' in relation to the physical punishment of children, reports Sean Mooney.

"A public forum about the physical punishment of children, organised by ACT Children & Young People Commissioner (CYPC) Alasdair Roy will soon be held in Canberra. Mr Roy is also working with a law student from the Australian National University (ANU) to develop a discussion paper on this contentious issue.

"The forum is the next step in an initiative that began in June 2010 with a letter from Mr Roy to ACT Attorney-General Simon Corbell seeking discussions about whether the ACT could be the first jurisdiction in Australia to remove the current common-law legal defence of "reasonable chastisement or discipline". ..."

Between The Lines

Dyslexia is a complex and much misunderstood condition, writes Karen Thomson.

"Among those children back at school, excited and eager to see their friends after the long summer holidays, are the 10 per cent who are dyslexic. For them, returning to school can be a time of dread and anxiety.

"Twelve years ago, as we prepared our son for his first day of preschool, we had no idea that over the next five years his life would be dominated by a series of tests to determine what was affecting his learning. Our hopes and dreams for Alexander that day were no doubt similar to those of countless parents before us. They didn't factor in dyslexia. ..."

Michelle MacFarlane had a best friend when she was at school, but she is noticing that friendships play out differently these days.

"... when my eldest son, Johnno, hit preschool, I was waiting to see who he'd pair up with. He played happily with many children, but especially liked a boy called Tim. Tim liked him back, and they became close. At some subconscious level, I felt we'd ticked the best-friend box for Johnno. Little did I know how wrong I was. ..."

Foundation Recipe

Handing on some family wisdom to her granddaughter gives Mary Pearl a new lease on life.

"My granddaughter Rachel and I have a history of cooking ‘googie' eggs. When she was four, she would stand on a chair to reach the kitchen bench, crack the eggs and stir the mixture in the frypan with a wooden spoon. Now that she's seven, Rachel reaches the bench on her own, and we have graduated to more sophisticated dishes like sponge cake and pumpkin soup.

"The recipes are my mum's; I sat at her kitchen table and took notes. Now I'm passing decades' worth of accumulated culinary wisdom on to Rachel..."

Happy To Help

Volunteering mum Suzy Mills is delighted to find she's cool at school.

"I'm not sure who enjoys my weekly canteen duty more - my boys, or me. I get such a thrill when I see the grins on their faces as they rush to be first in line. Of course, they're happy to see me in the middle of their school day, but I suspect their enthusiasm may also have something to do with the ‘free' stuff they get (which they pay for with a kiss over the counter). ..."

The Write Time

After some initial anxiety, Donna Webeck draws the line at forcing her son to write before he is ready.

"The meeting of milestones by our children is something many parents agonise over.

"At the start it seems harmless - the first smile, giggle, solid food. Then the big guns come out - crawling, walking, talking. How many teeth do they have? Are they sleeping through the night? Eventually it morphs into more tedious territory: is my child on a par with others their age? Are they falling behind? Will they be frustrated if they're ahead but being held back?

"I coasted along this comparison-strewn highway relatively carefree until I read a third-birthday card my son received. In it, one of his friends had scrawled his own name - and he wasn't even three. ..."

Lives Less Ordinary

A chance encounter leads Steve Biddulph to reflect on the nature of families and the challenges we all face.

"... She looks into the distance for a second. "We had a few problems too," she says softly. "Two of mine had cystic fibrosis." My mind is going fast here, because the conversation has taken a deeper turn. I know what a diagnosis of cystic fibrosis can mean, but she gets there before me. "Our little girl lived until she was five. Our son only got to 18 months. He didn't have to suffer so much." The awfulness of this sends ripples through my body, and I can only mumble something about how hard that must have been. She doesn't miss a beat, telling me that their three other girls are just fine, and are grown now with kids of their own. In the sum of things she's been blessed, I think is how she sees it. ..."

NEW: Special Series - Country Views

For most of us, getting our kids to school entails a short drive, walk or bus trip. But for families in rural and remote communities, it can be a very different story, reports Genevieve Barlow.

"The first night Lexie Brownhall stayed at the hostel where she would board so she could attend high school, her parents Kylie and Brett were anxious. The graziers from Jandowae, three-and-a-half hours west of Brisbane, wanted to give their 12-year-old daughter the best education they could. Dalby High School was too far at an hour's bus ride away, and the local Prep-10 government school had just 13 students in Years 8 to 10. It wasn't enough for Lexie.

"They chose instead to send their bright daughter to a hostel where she could board during the week while attending Chinchilla State High School, also an hour away. At least she could come home on the weekends - boarding school was another option, but would have meant fewer visits home. The Brownhalls weren't ready for that. "I was anxious and had so many mixed emotions," says Kylie of her daughter's leaving. "I sobbed. I thought, ‘I can't believe we are doing this', but we didn't let her know how we were feeling, because we didn't want her to know we were sad."

"Many parents in rural Australia face this scenario each year after making sometimes painful decisions about education. ..."

Special Series - D3: Diversity, Difference & Diagnosis

Senses And Sensitivities

Monica Wright struggled to find a diagnosis for her daughter's unusual behaviours, but persistence paid off.

"I have a four-year-old daughter. When people first meet her, they usually describe her as lively, clever, outgoing, friendly, affectionate and talkative. As they get to know her better they'd probably like to add descriptors such as difficult, stubborn, irritable, impatient and volatile. Most people would put these traits down to a mix of personality and behaviour, but there's another reason, known only to those close to her.

"My daughter has a neurological condition called sensory processing disorder (SPD). SPD affects the way she receives and interprets sights, sounds, touch, tastes, smells and movement. People with SPD may feel overwhelmed by sensory information, or, conversely, seek out sensory experiences. ..."

Book Reviews

This month, David Witt reviews:

The Little Refugee written by Anh Do and Suzanne Do and illustrated by Bruce Whatley.

Bureau Of Mysteries written by H.J. Harper and illustrated by Nahum Ziersch.

Diary Of A Soccer Start written by Shamini Flint and illustrated by Sally Heinrich.

The Tunnels Of Tarcoola written by Jennifer Walsh.

And Veronicah Larkin reviews:

Edge Of The World written by Ian Trevaskis and illustrated by Wayne Harris.

Bush Bash! written by Sally Morgan and illustrated by Ambelin Kwaymullina.

Demolition written by Sally Sutton and illustrated by Brian Lovelock.

King Jack and the Dragon written by Peter Bently and illustrated by Helen Oxenbury.

Your Views

This month's letters to the editor relate to hyperemesis gravidarum (morning sickness), families sponsoring children in underprivileged countries, and a mother capitulating and buying one of ‘those' toys with flashing lights and electronic sounds.

Family Calendar

You can access our online calendar, which is full of wonderful activities and events for families occurring in Canberra this month, at www.webchild.com.au, clicking on Calendar.